The Reverend has a bit of reputation as a love expert. It's an easy assumption to make: Judging by the probing, soul-searching songs on I Love You, Honeybear he's done his fair share of thinking on the subject. In our cover story interview—the singer waxes philosophical about marriage, love, intimacy and "this fucking mystery," a.k.a. just what the hell we're supposed to be doing with our time on earth. It's deep stuff well worth diving into. To mix it up, we hit him with some prosaic, advice-columnist-type inquiries. Read on to find out what The Rev has to say about criers, booty calls and the friend zone.
I've been seeing this guy for about two months. It's been great, but he's a crier.
Ask him to pick up crying alone at a bar. It worked wonders for me.
Is it possible for a married man and a single woman to be friends?
No, obviously men and women are biologically incapable of not being attracted to each other. God, it’s like no one taught you science.
MWhy do some people only want to engage in a textual based relationship?
Ask yourself some questions: Do you have a weird facial tick? Are you so beautiful it’s incapacitating? Do you cover everything in a thin and shimmering veil of spit when you talk? Have you accepted that the 21st century does indeed affect the nature of human interaction? Ask yourself all these things and then ask them if they want to have coffee and text them from across the table. Modern romance, baby.
How do you turn a booty call into a relationship?
Definitely by asking that question while spooning them.
My partner called me by a different name when we were having sex. Advice?
Pick a new name for them too. Forget you ever knew the other name. Assume your new identities and never look back.
How do you get out of the friend zone?
Turn that negative into a positive. See how many people you can get to friend zone you, make more friends than anyone else and then still die alone.
The Reverend plays Central Park SummerStage on August 5.
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